Something tumblr has taught me
“because of reasons” is always a legitimate reason
“because fuck you that’s why” is also acceptable
“for science” is a good excuse
don’t forget “the stars are not in position” as a perfect reason to not do something“Not since the accident.” can be the answer to any question.
you guys are leaving out “think of the children” as a way to persuade anybody to do something for you
Anonymous asked: Shakespeare was queer? I thought he only had affairs with ladies. What dudes did he get it on with?
OH U SWEET SUMMER CHILD
so remember those sonnets, you know, about one hundred and twenty-six of them, the whole thing about “shall i compare thee to a summer’s day”
written to a hot male earl, dude
in 1640 some asshole named john literally had to change all the pronouns in those 126 sonnets because they were super fuckin queer and he was not comfy with how super fuckin queer they were
also, like, casual elizabethan bisexuality? christopher “they who love not tobacco and boys are fools” marlowe? the venetian “tit bridge”, where prostitutes were commanded by official decree to stand around topless to entice men who were bangin’ too many dudes, because there were so many gay men it was becoming a legitimate social problem?
welcome to the wonderful world of “literally everyone in the past was queer”, friend, enjoy your stay